K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
