I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Enjoy the penises
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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