I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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