Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
