i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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