you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Man, jail baloney is awful.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
