I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
