When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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