Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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