apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
