I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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