I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
do nipples grow back?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
