I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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