The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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