we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
