just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
