you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
