Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
