Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
