Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I fill condoms, not promises.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
