so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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