Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
A+ Viking dick
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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