i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize