I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
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