You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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