Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
