idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
True strength comes from lack of pants
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
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