you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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