Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
