She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
