nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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