Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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