too bad you live with your parents still
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
