why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize