Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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