she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
