We're like a lot better than the average bears
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
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