Plan B is the new Plan A
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
