i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
