so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize