Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
