I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
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