You're completely useless in the revolution.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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