with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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