It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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