Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
