im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
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