i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
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