They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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