Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
